Sunday, October 24, 2021
Miles from the Mainstream
D. R. ZUKERMAN, proprietor

An Extract From an Important Forthcoming Executive Order from President Biden

August 5, 2021 --

As 46th president of the United States of America, I ,Joseph R. Biden, Jr. order that the social policy of the federal government will be  based on Woke-ism. Accordingly, as of September 1, 2021, the name of the official residence of the chief executive, and the venue of the "Oval Office," will be known as The Rainbow House. 

In view of the unfortunate aspects of the term "America," going back to unpleasant events of the year 1619, I further direct that the style of the homeland will be known, henceforth,  as "the United States of Diversity."

Additionally, as the term "white" suggests a reference to a certain and unsavory form of nationalism, the word "pallid" will replace "white" on all federal documents listing the various races and ethnic groups in census questionnaires.  

This is to invite Major League Baseball to change the name of the American League -- given my change in the name of our country --- to Diversity League.

Major League Baseball is encouraged, further, to change the name of its National League -- a term connoting a form of political extremism -- to Unity League.

Major League Baseball would also do well to change the name of the Chicago White Sox to the Chicago Pallid Sox